I am in a season of uncertainty right now... am I where I am meant to be? Is my life one that is effective?
As a christian (and not always a particularly good one) there are compromises that I have made in my lifestyle, maybe even justified as acceptable by God. Being a part of the Momentum Youth Conference went a long way toward exposing some of these hypocrisies in my life (Nothing like standing in front of 1500+ teens as a part of a worship team).
A lot of that is beginning to change. I feel like a failure in many areas of my life mostly having to do with complacency and laziness... funny thing is I am reminded of a line from Batman Begins, "And why do we fall, Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves up." It's a philosophy that followers of Christ can live by... we're not perfect and our failures are an opportunity to rise again improved, wiser. Not that we should justify sin or abuse grace. In this brief life we're given limited chances to make a difference, to be effective, I want to take advantage of those opportunities rather then squander them as I have previously. The idea that I am a "mist," here today, gone tomorrow is a profound reality.
This might not be a popular line of thought, in fact... I know it isn't. I don't know where I am going, I just know that God is moving and I am hopeful that He will use me in the process. Pray that answers will be clear or at the very least which direction to go would be revealed.
Reading: The Book of Job, Radical: Taking Back Your Faith From The American Dream
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